I sat at my table today and smoked half a pack of cigarettes in one sitting. It was a long sitting, three hours. The doctor has examined the eyes that sprout out of my body and thinks it's either a fungus or parasite. "Reptiles don't put out roots," he said; "only plants do. Stay away from green potatoes and yeasty foods." I tried to ask him if it had anything to do with the fact that I'm an asexual creature with neither gender nor reproductive organs, but he rushed through his explanation and then left the room, and I didn't get a chance to explain my question. He gave me some anti-fungal ointment to put on the sprouting eyes. I dig out the eyes instead of putting on the ointment; I don't think that doctor knows what he's talking about, I think he's just stabbing in the dark. I have no nerves or sensation in the sprouts; I really do think my body thinks that it's dead, and is trying to lay a new Swamp Thing in the earth. A great reaching potato plant, its roots wrapped about three or four fetal Swamp Things will probably come when the springtime hits my grave.